One of my biggest struggles is patience. I think the same holds true for any high-achieving man. We tend to want the results immediately. Unfortunately, it just doesn't work that way. That, however, does not mean we need to sit back and simply wait for our goals to come to fruition. Today, I share six strategies for exercising patience while assertively working towards our objectives.
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In our first-ever "Ask Me Anything," Ryan Michler and Kipp Sorensen field questions from members of the Order of Man Facebook Group. They cover how one overcomes guilt and past mistakes, how to support a wife with a stressful job, how to change the future, and so much more.
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There is so much to talk about in the world today but very few people who are capable of having an intelligent conversation about some sensitive subjects without completely losing their minds.
Today, I am joined again by my friend, Sal Di Stefano to talk about a lot of these hot and polarizing topics including how technology is changing conversation, the moral implications of markets and governments, how important it is that fathers are in the home, the legalization of drugs, the shift towards nihilism, and everywhere in between.
SHOW HIGHLIGHTS
SAL DI STEFANO
Sal Di Stefano is back for round two.
He is someone that I've gotten to know over the past couple of years. We've been able to connect because we agree on a lot of the same issues and are extremely interested in having important and relevant dialogue on topics most people shy away from.
Sal is the co-founder of MindPump Media. He's spent nearly 20 years as a fitness and personal trainer and focused science and truth to the fitness industry.
Although we only talk about fitness and nutrition towards the end of this conversation, it's apparent that Sal is someone who strives to find objective truth in all facets of life and prides himself and sharing that truth with others.
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Unfortunately, finding a man of character, conviction, and principle has become increasingly difficult. More and more, men are becoming wishy-washy, weak, cowardly, and otherwise pathetic.
Today, I share 5 simple strategies every man can employ to grow a spine become a man of strength and character.
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Building a business is something on so many men's minds. I can't even begin to count how many men I hear from who are unsatisfied with where they are with regards to their professional life and career path.
Today, I talk with my good friend, Jordan Harbertson, co-founder of MTNOPS, to uncover how he's been able to build a thriving business. We cover the importance of proximity to other powerful people, how to know when you're ready to take the entrepreneurial leap, striking the balance between giving and taking, and how every man can build a business of meaning and significance.
SHOW HIGHLIGHTS
Men, I am honored to introduce you to my friend, Jordan Harbertson.
He and I met years ago as we both launched our businesses around the same time. I've been inspired watching him market his business and create something truly special for himself, his business partners, his community, and his family. I've watched him and his partners take MTN OPS from a simple idea to a powerhouse in the very crowded marketplace of supplemental nutrition.
Jordan is one of the most real people I know. He takes about his struggles personally and professionally including his transformation with his fitness over the past several months and what it takes to succeed in business and life.
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Most men know how critical it is to build a team around him but very few men invest the time, energy, and resources into building one. Today I talk about why a team is so important and share five strategies for building a powerful group of men who will help you succeed.
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Legendary is a term we hear often. But, when is the last time you actually thought about what it meant? Being legendary is about creating and living a life in which the principles and lessons you leave behind will last long after you're dead and gone.
Today, I'm joined by the President of Sorinex, Bert Sorin. We cover the importance of creating the right culture, balancing family time with professional ambition, leading through vulnerability, and how a man becomes legendary.
SHOW HIGHLIGHTS
BERT SORIN
My guest today is Bert Sorin, CEO of Sorinex. If you're not familiar with Sorinex, they are the leading innovator in American made strength and conditioning equipment.
Bert grew up in the business his dad started nearly four decades ago and has since gone on to develop, refine, and innovate the business into what it is today.
Bert is a former Division 1 Track and Field All-American and an Olympics trails athlete. Since then, he's gone on to build his family business and create a legacy that reaches far beyond what he and his father have built.
He's become a friend over the past several months and I can't think of a better man to talk with me about leading ourselves, our businesses, and our families the best way we're capable of.
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There's a lot of talk about "evolving the definition" of masculinity. What a shame since masculinity has driven much of the positive growth we enjoy in society today. Couple the desire to change what masculinity is with the confusion about what it is in the first place and it's easy to understand why there's so much misinformation about what masculinity is and, ultimately, what it means to be a man.
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Addiction is something a lot of men are facing. Whether it's an addiction to alcohol, pornography, or drugs, it is something that can be overcome.
Today, I am joined by UFC fighter, Court McGee, to talk about his battle with addiction and his ability over the past decade to fight and win this never-ending battle. We talk about his positive upbringing, how he used fighting as an outlet, the disease of addiction, his downward spiral, and how he has overcome his drug addiction. This one is a bit different as I wanted to give Court the platform to share his story so I gave him the mic and let him run.
SHOW HIGHLIGHTS
COURT MCGEE
I'm honored to introduce you to my guest, Mr. Court McGee.
Court is a UFC fighter and the winner of the 11th season of the Ultimate Fighter. Despite his accomplishments in the ring, today, we focus on his personal life outside of it
Court spent a lot of his life hooked on just about every drug imaginable and once overdosed on heroin where he was estimated to have spent 8 minutes without a heartbeat or pulse.
There is no doubt that Court McGee is a man who knows how to fight but I am absolutely blown away with the story of his greatest battle in overcoming addiction, walking the path of long-term sobriety, how he handles adversity, and how he's taken his greatest challenge and turned himself into a force for good.
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Learning to market yourself is such a critical skill to develop. Whether you're working to secure a promotion, get a date, pick up new clients, or enlist your children in getting the chores done, your ability to market yourself effectively will spell the difference between success and failure.
Today, I break down seven key strategies for improving your ability to market yourself to whoever you may be trying to win over.
www.orderofman.com/FFN117
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Let's be honest, Yoga isn't a thought you'd immediately conjure up as manly. But, as I've recently discovered, participating in Yoga has significantly improved my performance, strength, and fitness all of which every man should be striving to improve.
Today, I'm joined by repeat guest, Dean Pohlman, to talk about his new book. We cover why every man should consider incorporating Yoga in his fitness regimen, how flexibility improves strength, the unknown benefits for men of participating in Yoga, and how a man can learn to connect mind and spirit through the practice of Yoga.
SHOW HIGHLIGHTS
DEAN POHLMAN
My guest today is my friend Dean Pohlman. Dean and I met years ago when he was first on my show. Since then, we've become friends and I've started incorporating some of what he's been teaching into my own life.
He is the founder of Man Flow Yoga, which is an online platform designed to help men learn the fundamentals and foundation of Yoga, and how it can improve every aspect of their fitness.
I was a little skeptical at first but I've been amazed and how much this guy knows about functional fitness, strength building, and men's health in general.
Today, we talk about a lot of different elements of health and fitness including the message from his latest book, Yoga Fitness for Men.
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Today, we talk about the importance of finding a hobby and 5 strategies for finding hobbies that engage your mind and soul. It's easy to dismiss the notion of carving out time for ourselves considering all our responsibilities but it's imperative if we have any hope of becoming the men we're capable of becoming.
www.orderofman.com/FFN116
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There is no shortage of diet and nutrition advice out there. Most of it is hype, gimmicky, extremely biased, and untested/unfounded. It's no wonder though as most of us are after the quick fix to a lifetime of making bad food and exercise choices.
Today, I am joined by Chad Howse, author of "The Man Diet," to talk about why these other diets fail and why a man's approach to what he eats should be relatively simple. We talk about the specific benefits of incorporating this style of nutrition in your life, why intermittent fasting works so well, keys to developing testosterone naturally and safely, society's emasculation of men, and why you should consider incorporating the "Man Diet" into your life.
My guest today is someone that I've been following and paying attention to for quite some time.
We only recently connected with the release of his latest book, The Man Diet. He has been on a mission over the past several years of reclaiming what it means to be a man and his goals and objectives are very much in alignment with what we share here in the Order of Man.
He is the founder of Chad Howse Fitness and Average 2 Alpha and today he is here to talk about the power of incorporating what he has dubbed, "the man diet."
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The path of most resistance. It's a term you'll rarely hear. That's because we, as men, are hard-wired to look for the path of least resistance. And, while there's merit to being efficient and effective in the quickest, most convenient way possible, it's not always in our best interest to take the easy route. Today, I share why.
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Every man, at some point, will lose his way. It's not really a question of "if" but a question of "when." When that day comes, the way you decided to face that adversity will spell the difference in you overcoming or succumbing.
My guest today, powerlifter Brandon Lilly, is a man who has faced his fair share of obstacles but refuses to quit and always charges forward. We talk about the power of saying "no," why nothing ends with a period, how to develop more confidence, overcoming the need to be seen, and why every man ought to consider adopting the mantra, "Work, Don't Whine."
SHOW HIGHLIGHTS
• Why working without whining is so powerful
• How to say "no"
• Why problems scale and how to avoid it
• Why nothing ends with a "period"
• Finding the middle ground and why it's so important
• Why the way we do things matters
• How to develop and build more confidence
• Overcoming the need to be seen
• How ego and arrogance are hurting you
• The power of integrity and telling the truth
BRANDON LILLY
My guest today is my friend, Brandon Lilly. A lot of you know who this man is but if you don't, I'm not sure how you've missed him.
He's one of the biggest men I know and certainly one of the strongest. He is ranked as one of the strongest powerlifters and consistently lifts more than 2,000lbs combined in the deadlift, squat and bench press.
He's worked with and consulted SEAL Teams, University of Kentucky Football, the Bengals, and numerous other organizations and Crossfit gyms around the country.
But on top of all that, he's a man who is extremely humble in failure and victory (you'll hear some of those stories today). Today he's going to be talking about overcoming some of his trials and why he's adopted "Work, Don't Whine" as his mantra.
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There are a lot of men who want to fix their marriages. While it sounds counterintuitive, the best way to fix your marriage is to fix yourself. Because, when you improve who you are as a man and how you're showing up as a husband, you're naturally going to produce a better marriage. Sure, a strong marriage is the result of the things that both you and your wife are doing but there's nothing you can do about her. That's why it's best to focus on the one thing you can control - yourself.
Here are 7 ways to do just that...
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Every man will, at some point, be placed in a position of leadership, whether it's in the walls of his home, a new project at work, a promotion, ecclesiastical services, with friends, or simply leading himself. His ability to lead effectively will spell the difference between success and failure in any endeavor.
Today, I am joined by retired Green Beret Lieutenant Colonel, Scott Mann to talk about how to be a strong leader. We talk about the importance of becoming a great storyteller, how to play your position well and allow others to do the same, why leaders need to learn to get out of the way, and how you can lead from the top.
SHOW HIGHLIGHTS
Today, I have the honor of introducing you to retired Green Beret Lieutenant Colonel, Scott Mann.
He is a master at building relationships in high-stakes, competitive environments, as you might imagine. He spent 23 years in the United States Army (18 of which in were spent as a Green Beret) where he specialized in missions all over the world including Colombia, Iraq, and Afghanistan.
He is also a regular contributor on CNN, Fox, and Bloomberg, and many others where he shares his insights and experience when it comes to leading teams effectively.
Obviously, he's worked in some extremely hostile environments where he's been able to lead missions effectively through his ability to build trust and credibility where most of that had been destroyed.
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So many men love to play the victim card. They believe everybody and everything is stacked against them. In reality, we know that's not true. Here's why people do it and 5 ways to avoid making yourself into a victim.
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Every time you turn around, you're bombarded with a thousand ads, a million choices, and an endless supply of options and "opportunities." It's becoming increasingly difficult to manage the landscape of the ever-growing decisions that need to be made. Add to that our desire to be seen and perceived a certain way by people we may not even know or like, and it's easy to see why the disease of wanting more is becoming a real problem.
My guest today, Joshua Becker, makes the case for why more is less. He argues (and, I agree) that having less stuff in our life can truly unlock the key to a more meaningful and purpose-driven life. We talk about the benefits of owning less, why we have the desire to own more than we'll ever need or use, the burden extra possessions place on our lives, and how you can become a minimalist.
SHOW HIGHLIGHTS
JOSHUA BECKER
Gentlemen, I have the honor of introducing you to my guest today, Joshua Becker.
He is the founder of Becoming Minimalist and the bestselling author of The More of Less. And, in the spirit of the message we'll be discussing today, I will keep this introduction short.
We were introduced by a mutual friend who had taken much of what Joshua has been teaching and incorporating it into his own life. I did some initial research and immediately recognized a need to adopt the practice of "rational minimalism" into my own. I've already begun implementing some of his teachings and I can honestly say I've been able to free up more mental and physical capacity for more important pursuits in my life.
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Society is becoming softer. Society is becoming weaker. This idea of softness is perpetuated by much of society, the school system, media, and entertainment and Hollywood. We do ourselves a huge disservice when we overlook the importance of being strong, tough, gritty, resilient, and all the things that we would traditionally think of when we think of how a man shows up in life.
I'm not suggesting by any means that a man can't be loving, supportive, open, and vulnerable. Of course, he can be those things. There is a time and a place to be that way but to say that that's always the case, to say that we need to be softer at the expense of these other masculine virtues, is hurting society in general. There will come a point in time where those traditional masculine virtues are to be used in order to produce productive outcomes for ourselves, our loved ones, and the people we care about.
Typically, this manifests itself in a negative situation, whether that's something in the family like a divorce, loss of a loved one, or being laid off from a job, but it also applies to natural disasters and emergencies. For example, Hurricane Harvey in Texas and the fires in California last year. During these times, we saw countless men, step up and do what it is that men do best. We also see why strength is important in the global arena as well when it comes to military conflict, for example. It's critical we never overlook the importance of harnessing the power of being tough, resilient, gritty, et cetera.
Today, I want to talk with you about some of the consequences and symptoms of the softening of society. And, I also want to talk about why softness is spreading. I'm not a conspiracy theorist but I do think there are some factors at work here that are promoting this idea of clinging to these softer virtues at the expense of the harder virtues. We're going to talk about how we can become tougher, more resilient, and stronger because the last thing I want to do is complain, whine, or nag about a topic without providing any solutions.
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In a world where everyone and everything is clamoring for your attention, it is becomingly increasingly difficult to focus on the vital few as opposed to the trivial many.
My guest today, Greg McKeown, the New York Times Bestselling Author of Essentialism, makes the case for why less can actually be more. We talk about how to eliminate distractions, the criteria for measuring what task you should actually focus on, how to establish proper boundaries, and why every man should take on the disciplined pursuit of less.
Gentlemen, I want to introduce you to my guest today, Mr. Greg McKeown. He is a man who needs no introduction for many of you.
If you're familiar with his work at all, you've likely read the book, Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less. In this New York Times Bestselling book, Greg makes the case for why each of us should strive to focus on the few things that actually matter as opposed to the tasks and projects many of us get bogged down with.
He's spoken all over the world at industry conferences, huge companies like Apple, Google, Facebook, and Twitter, and governments including a personal invitation from the Prince of Norway.
Needless to say, this is a man who knows what he's talking about when it comes to doing less but producing more.
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I see so many men who don't have any level of respect for themselves let alone being able to command any respect from others. I was noticing the other day as I was walking to the post office, that there were people who wouldn't even look me in the eye. And, not only would they not look me in the eye, they were working hard to ensure that they didn't have to look me in the eye. When I shake people's hand, I get these limp fish handshakes. Those are just two small examples of the manifestation of a lack of confidence. It's bad, guys. You know exactly what I'm talking about. You've seen this in co-workers, friends, kids, and maybe even yourself.
And, if you're someone who is not commanding respect, you are living a life less than you're capable of. I don't want that to be the case. I want you, as a man to step up, to be assertive, confident, to be able to ask for promotions, ask women on dates, and get out of this life what you should. And, part of that is being able to command the respect of other people.
When I talk about commanding respect, one of the things that I'm really addressing here is the idea of the "X-factor." We've all seen it. We've all been to a meeting, conference or office setting when we just feel somebody walk into the room. We turn around and see this guy who has "it," whatever "it" is. We can't quite put our finger on it but we know that this is a guy that has something special; there's something unique about this individual. What a lot of men do is write that off and dismiss it as something that he was naturally gifted or naturally born with. Sure, there may be men who have a predisposition to be more like this but I'll tell you what, being able to develop what most people write off as the "X-factor" is something that can be developed. I know this because that's what I've been able to do.
For a long time (especially when I was younger) I walked around very insecure, very complacent, and frankly just a little bit afraid and scared of life in general. I couldn't make eye contact with people. I couldn't hold a conversation. And not only that, I actually just tried to avoid people altogether. It wasn't up until relatively recently that I have been able to develop a level of confidence that allows me to look in another person's eyes. This newfound level of confidence allows me to ask and command exactly what I believe I deserve. I'm just telling you, from experience, it's a significantly better way to live.
I made a post on Instagram two or three weeks ago about teaching others how to treat you. A lot of people agreed with me and said, "Yeah, you definitely teach other people how to treat you," and other people blew that off and dismissed it. I believe that you and I are constantly teaching other people how we will be treated. We do this through our actions and our words and the way we carry ourselves We teach our kids, spouses, colleagues, employers, and bosses to what level of respect we will be treated with.
That's the last thing I want to see in men. I want men to walk around with their heads held high. I want them to have a level of confidence in what they're doing, who they are, and how they show up because I believe that this will, first, save their sanity and well-being and, second, determine much of their success.
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We all know that we need to be mentally tough. There's no question of that. Yet, forging mental toughness seems to be one of the most elusive pursuits. All of us know how to develop physical toughness but rarely do we have any practices in place that will help us develop mental toughness.
My guest today, Ryan Lange, is one of the most mentally tough men I know. It's amazing considering he's only 21 years old. I won't get into all that he's accomplished just yet but please understand that the amount of physical strain he's put on his body is simply incredible. Today we talk about developing the capability to transcend pain, fostering the willingness to embrace hardship, why hard work is omnipotent, and how to forge more mental toughness.
Ryan Lange reached out a couple months ago and asked to come on the podcast.
Honestly, at first thought, I wasn't going to have him on because so many people talk about mental toughness. It's a little like saying you want to talk about leadership.
But then, I started looking into what this kid has done. And, I say kid because he's only 20 years old. Now, I realize he's a man (not a child) but I'm absolutely blown away with what he's done already.
He's completed 50K's, 50 milers, 100 milers, and at the end of last year completed a 238 mile race in Moab, UT. To give you an idea of what that means, it took roughly 86 hours for him to complete.
I'm incredibly inspired by Ryan and his approach to mental toughness. You will be too.
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We've all seen the movie, Peter Pan. It's fictional work but it seems that more and more it paints an eerily familiar picture with what we see in the boys who never want to grow up into men.
I'll give you a prime example. Just the other day, there was a piece I read about a 30-year old man who had taken his parents to court because his parents were "evicting" him from their house. How pathetic is this? Maybe there's something wrong with this guy (obviously there's something wrong with this guy). But it's amazing that his thought process is to fight so hard to stay at home. I can't help, but there's something seriously wrong with him. But in addition to that, I can't help but think there's something wrong with the parents. How was this guy raised? How was he fathered?
When I was done with high school, we went on our senior trip. The day I got home - the very next day - I moved out. It wasn't' because I had anything against my mother but because it was time. It was time to leave the nest. I see so many boys who are more concerned with staying at home than experiencing life. They're more concerned with not having bills and upholding their responsibilities. They're more concerned with Call of Duty or Fortnite (or whatever the game is that they're playing). They're shirking their responsibilities. They don't have jobs. And, their parents are enabling them to actually do this. And we question why we're having problems with our boys turning into men. This is the failure to launch syndrome - the rise of the Peter Pans.
The good news is that there are some solutions to this. If you find yourself in a position where you're a boy or a male who wants to grow up but can't figure out how to do it, this article will provide the solution. I see so many men who use the excuse of not having a father figure in their life to justify their lack of performance as men. I can't believe that it needs to be addressed, but it certainly does. So, let's talk about this today.
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All of us have a story. We all have a past. Our prior circumstances define who we are today but do not have to define who we will become moving forward. Too bad most of us never learn to rewrite the script.
Today, I am joined by a friend and man who is impacting and influencing millions. His name is Charlie Jabaley and he's someone who walked away from a multi-million dollar business to rewrite his life, lose a massive amount of weight, become an endorsed Nike athlete, and bike across the USA. We talk about what inspired him to make a life-altering change and how he is using positivity to change the world.
I met Charlie several months ago when he and I were podcasting in St. Louis with Andy Frisella on the MFCEO Podcast.
He and I immediately hit it off and I was extremely inspired by him, his story, and the positive changes he is making in his life.
This man is a Nike endorsed athlete although he doesn't look like your typical athlete. But, it's a testament to who he is, his infectious energy, and how powerful his past, present, and future are.
Right now, he's biking across the USA in order to share his story and help others live the life they're meant to live.
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